Valentine’s Day… the holiday of love! Hearts, flowers, chocolates, and romantic gestures everywhere you look. For couples, it’s a sweet reminder of their bond, a chance to celebrate togetherness. But if you’re flying solo, this season can feel like a magnifying glass on what you don’t have. It’s hard not to get lost in the sea of couples’ posts on social media or feel the weight of having missed out on “cuffing season.” If you’ve spent the winter on your own, chances are Valentine’s Day might trigger some lonely feelings. But before you pull out the tissues or rush into something just for the sake of it, let’s flip the script. This year, the most important relationship you need to nurture is the one you have with yourself. And trust, self-love is the best kind of love, especially this Valentine’s Day.

As Jaya Jaya Myra, former immunologist turned best selling author and mind-body wellness expert, puts it: “Focus on building a strong relationship with yourself first. When you prioritize your own growth and happiness, you’ll attract the kind of connection that aligns with your values — rather than rushing into something just to keep up with others.”

Jaya’s advice serves as a powerful reminder to invest in nurturing your own emotional well-being rather than seeking validation from someone else. Self-love is not about treating yourself to spa days or indulgent purchases every now and then; although those acts can be part of it. True self-love is an ongoing process of emotional growth and intentional self-care that leads to a deeper understanding of who you are, what you value, and what makes you truly happy.

Self-development is more than just buying yourself flowers or allowing yourself to enjoy a candy bar this February. The hope is that this integration of self-recognition and worth will aid in what Jaya Jaya Myra calls “conscious character development.” It is an idea rooted in trying to become the best version of ourselves. When you take the time – through your everyday actions – to understand your thoughts and feelings and focus on finding peace within, you set yourself up for real growth and deeper self-love.

This is especially vital during the cold, somewhat isolating months of the winter, which also happen to coincide with “Cuffing Season:” that familiar time of year when many feel compelled to seek out a companion in time for Valentine’s Day. But, what if this “cuffing” period isn’t about finding someone else to care for, but about deepening the relationship with the most important person in your life… you?

Jaya Jaya Myra shares three different ways you can prioritize yourself this Valentine’s Day!

  • Set Personal Goals and Celebrate Wins

Having clear, personal goals is not just about staying busy, it’s about intentionally cultivating a sense of accomplishment. Every small win, every forward step, however minor it may feel, helps build confidence and reinforces that you are on a journey of progress.

This “cuffing season” might feel lonely at times, but that doesn’t mean your life is on hold. Take the opportunity to create personal growth by setting daily or weekly goals. Achieving them will help boost your mood, giving you a solid reason to celebrate yourself. Whether it’s a new workout routine, learning a skill, or tackling a personal project you’ve put off, recognizing even the smallest of victories reinforces that you are enough, right now, as you are.

  • Practice Self-Care and Gratitude Daily

We’ve all heard the term “self-care” thrown around, but often, it feels like something that gets lost in the shuffle of our busy lives. During this time when loneliness can creep in, the best antidote is consistency. The mind craves routine, and when you prioritize self-care every day, it enhances your ability to navigate challenges in a healthy way.

Self-care isn’t limited to occasional treatments, such as a bubble bath or a weekend away (though both are wonderful!). To truly nurture your well-being, it’s essential to engage in daily practices that feel fulfilling. This can range from mindful meditation in the morning, journaling for gratitude, doing yoga, or simply taking a moment each day to reflect on what’s good in your life. Focusing on what you’re thankful for can shift your perspective from feeling unworthy of love to realizing that you are, in fact, whole and deserving… right now.

  • Pursue Growth and Passions

Lastly, a key to thriving as a single person is consistently working on growing into the best version of yourself. This isn’t about striving to “fix” anything or chasing unrealistic standards of perfection. Instead, it’s about embracing your passions, exploring new interests, and nourishing what makes you feel alive. Whether it’s a hobby you’ve always wanted to try, a new class or activity, or a cause that fills your heart with purpose. There’s no shortage of opportunities to grow.

Take this time to focus inward and surround yourself with positive people who support and encourage your journey. Pursuing personal growth means giving yourself permission to evolve at your own pace. It’s through growth that we often become more aligned with what we need from a potential relationship – not just someone to “cuff” for a season, but a meaningful connection that aligns with who we truly are.

This Valentine’s Day season, don’t feel pressured by societal expectations or the urgency of “cuffing” up. Instead, tap into the power of self-love. By prioritizing your emotional and spiritual growth, focusing on building a connection with yourself, and engaging in practices that elevate your well-being, you’ll set the foundation for attracting a love that is authentic, supportive, and lasting — when the time is right. After all, the most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself.